Hello Dr. H’Artbeats,
I love music like crazy. I mean I Love music! Should that pose a problem, sir? Okay, I’m a 300 level student schooling as well as based in Lagos. Dr. H’Artbeats, the problem is my friends now really complain a lot about how I adore music stars! Truth is, I just so love, love them! There’s nothing really queer about that, is there? Akon is my “idol”. Sorry, I don’t want to use the word idol, you may be tempted to think I’m obsessive about this. But that’s not even my problem. I’ll tell you what it is.
My problem presently is my boyfriend—and a few of my friends. My boyfriend thinks I’d better go date Olamide Badoo here in Lagos, since I wouldn’t be able to get near Akon in the US. He says I interject with “chitchat” about Olamide a lot when we talk together. What I don’t understand is it seems he’s actually beginning to be kinda jealous! Like, I don’t get! He’s my boyfriend and we’re in a serious relationship considering settling down together in the nearest future! Olamide is my Nigerian idol, yes – but I’m not in Olamide’s class; I can’t date Olamide, that’s what he doesn’t get! He says I’m starstruck—maybe. But I think he’s having some inferiority complex, because he is not the celebrity—imagine that! Can you see my point, sir? Or what do you think? But do you think I’m really obsessed with stars? Seems it’s affecting my relationship emotionally. Do you think I’m… O.B.S.E.S.S.E.D? Like seriously?
Will expect your reply,
• • •
What do you like me to answer? 🙂 You’re big time OBSESSED!—Are you sad? 🙂 Don’t be; cos, actually, you’re NOT obsessed? Are you fine, now? 😉
Now, let’s stop kidding! If music will now will listen and stop asking and answering her own questions.
Hey, did you subtle things like the fact that you began your letter with “I love music like crazy” and then reiterate that fact in the next line? Do you notice how you “so love, love” music stars? How you corrected the suggestive notion of “idol” in your Akon—he’s no more everyone’s Akon for C.G. you know? Don’t you think all those emotions would have sifted through talk in your conversations with your man; would have taken much your attention from him to “Him”.
I’m yet to see a man who doesn’t want to be seen as his lady’s hero, same as I’ve never seen a person without admired heroes. I have my admired celebrities—music stars, writers and all those! I admire and adore a set few quite a lot—those are heroes and role models. But I make room for the fact that they are as human as I am and, secondly, they are not my personal person. Your man is your person, ,not Olamide or Akon. When a man knows you will not date your arts hero not because you won’t possibly have the chance to but because you adore and man as he is and unequaled, then that is knowing how to balance right the affection heartbeats in your chest!
Give arts its place, and personal relationships its own place! Balance well your heartbeats 🙂
Dr. H’Artbeats Series is a creative fictional letter series intended to mimic expected relatable scenarios and experiences and questions of that lovers of the arts entertainment may have. It is written by Kayode Taiwo Olla.