On “DasukiGate” and Other Stories: Tales from a City of Crime


By Babajide Michael Olusegun

Tick tock tick tock…

There is a way every year stands unique from other years. You will all agree with me that last year was an interesting year in our sociopolitical lives in Nigeria. Apart from the events that culminated to the polls of the presidential election, the interesting twist to the political and electoral storyline of the Kogi polls, the latest phrase, “inconclusive elections” added to the jargon of our electoral processes, the FFK prolific logorrhea in all matters of electoral campaign and propaganda, Sai Baba’s slow and steady approach to our political demands, his superman ministerial nominations, the Saraki-Dogara outsmarting of their sponsor political party and many more—this young year 2016 has been quite interesting and promising already, with all the many headlines.

Is it the oscillating supply of petrol to Nigerian consumers and the attendant liberation of the pump price, or is it the epiphany of the Ebola incarnate called Lassa fever or the renaissance of the Biafran struggle; or, yet, am I to ignore how our dear naira is bowing to the rising power of the dollar? These and many more have occupied the stage of 2016 since its 24 days of emergence.

Fellow Nigerians, it is shocking to see how this year 2016 may “carry-go.” Apart from the carryover of the Dasuki’s case of mass looting, we could not be more electrocuted when we heard the rumoured misplacement of our National Budget within the senatorial watch of the Upper Chamber of the Nigerian National Assembly. What is more, the Nigerian Literary Scene was upset by two biting occurrences namely: The Revelation of a Silenced Sexual Abuse Perpetrated by a Prominent Nigerian Poet & the Molestation of a Popular Performance Artist by the Black-Uniformed Nigerian Police.

Since the DasukiGate soap opera, the Nigerian audience has been entertained by series of expository episodes of how the large sum of 2.1 billion dollars was politically shared among various “Ambassadors of Poverty and Possessors at the Gate.” More than ever, our country is experiencing a lot of things done in the dark being brought to light; 2016 has been a year of revelations of molestation, the molestation having a canal and political face.

If there is a country that has learnt how to euphemize the language of crime, then it is Nigeria. This is a country where “innocent until proven guilty” is a memory verse. The entire country speaks of corruption in such a way that our discourse of corruption oxidizes it the more. As a country, we have learnt to seek alternatives to underdevelopment and poverty.

This is a country that blames its youths. This is a country that reminds its youths of 1960-youths whose youthful enterprise and entrepreneurial zeal led the country to Independence, to Coups, to Counter-coups, to Civil War, and many more. This is a country that is so forgetful. This is a country that tramples on its youths to rise.

This is a country that uses its youths to perpetrate crimes. In this city of crimes, the available governmental jobs are: robbery, prostitution, kidnapping, thuggery, 419-ing, intellectual trafficking and a host of other crimes. The few youths that are trying to do something clean in this our city of crimes are either underpaid, underemployed, mis-employed; or are sexually, intellectually, economically and/or politically abused and corrupted.

To whom it may concern: please I beg of you, stop abusing the youths of this generation. You, who talk of former Heads of State and Coup Planners as making history in their late twenties and early forties, please let me ask it of you: Do you know today’s date? When last have you gone round the schools in this country? What exactly do you want from this generation? You who write those thought-provoking posts, what have you offered the youths of this generation if not an impoverished country? The people you delight in referencing took over from something and not from nothing. These are people who had the choice of complementing the efforts of their colonizers but rather delighted in staging a “Game of Thrones”. And to you who must share these posts, look for articles like the one written by Kenneth Ezaga on the hypocrisy of our common failure and how we have all sold our country to the benefit of the Whiteman because as Nigerians, we have all “failed this city”…

The former National Security Adviser turned “National-Cake” Distributor must be made to account for the thousands of lives and properties lost to the Boko Haram insurgency. His crimes are beyond misappropriation of funds and arms scam. He should also be charged for accomplice to Genocide, Mutiny and Conspiracy. But how was there a Distributor without a Supplier? Still wondering how the then National-Cake Baker hasn’t been arrested by now…

Finally, these stories are fated to end the way we desire them to. Whether we like it or not, 2016 is only a blank sheet while we determine what to write on it.

Tick tock tick tock tick tock…

Litterateur famously called Literati, Babajide Michael Olusegun writes to heal, teach and opine. But when none of these seem to flow with his writing thoughts, he seeks an alternative in performance poetry. Don’t ask him what he does for a living; he is still busy living. He was shortlisted for the Uganda-based BabisaiNiwe Poetry Prize last year and is currently a mentee in the BabisaiMentorship Programme.

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